MY
NAME
ROBERT
TRABOLD
“just
now goldsandaled Dawn”
Sappho
Has someone called me? I believe
so.
My breathing gives me a clue.
I feel at my center, a presence
there
silent – dark – unknowable
its mystery touches me.
I am immersed in darkness, light
they mingle, weave the quilt of
my life’s journey.
I listen to the mystery, feel
that
someone has called my name.
In the many currents, undertows
of my life
I was remembered.
I was not forgotten, someone
called me
walked with me.
I feel, remember how I stumbled
in my years
hard streets with dangerous
curves.
I was forced to walk - drive in
the night.
But I hear my name, voice calls
me
from afar, not from this world
but from my center coming from
the mysterious presence
giving my name a deep sound,
different
from the ordinary.
It now has an echo of depth
meaning, cutting through all the
confusion of life.
Someone calls my name – call of
love
special because it is from the
Divine, Absolute.
I have a Beloved who is totally
different.
When He acts, He breaks all
barriers
I enter into a new world.
Darkness, mystery of my life
still lay on me
but I know, I have a Beloved who
calls - remembers me.
-----------------------------------
CYCLES OF OUR LIFE
Robert Trabold
As we end an old year and begin
another new one, this can be a time of reflection on our life and that of the
world with all its pluses and minuses. On one level, our life in the world is a
mired of many cycles and events which swirl around us and keep on
changing. We have our private life of
family and friends and our own personal development which can keep on changing
with new people and events. Our children grow up and move away, friends and
family members that we love die and are no longer in our presence. There is the
level of our work in the world where we attempt to live out our vocation and
profession in life and to earn our daily bread. The profession that we have
been trained in may change and we may lose our position there. How then do we
retool ourselves so that we can continue to work and support ourselves? There
is the greater world which can be very complicated and bring many injustices
and violence. We have a political process in which we participate but which
does not always work to our benefit and that of the world. We are disturbed by the never ending violence
and wars which plague our existence. At times, we feel hopeless in trying to
stop and change this. Our life on earth is a cauldron of never ending changes
in which we try to keep our heads above water. This can be a discouraging
process and we have to rely on friends and Jesus to help us on the way.
There is another level of living in
one sense does not change like that of the world but continues on in one
direction. This level is manifest in our
daily fidelity to meditate twice for twenty minutes each time. This meditation
and prayer time puts us in the path to grow in our relationship with God who
becomes the anchor of our existence. Jesus does not come and go as the things
in the world. This orientation of our life to the Lord is not an easy task
because He is mystery and transcendent and there can be much darkness in this
relation. But deep down we feel attracted to the Lord who is present to us at
our center and still point. No one is so close to us as He is. In addition, we
discover in our prayer and faith life that God loves us and offers to us
unconditional love which we cannot find in others on earth. We are born and
thrown into the universe and can be lost in this process. In our faithfulness
to contemplative prayer, we discover that the Jesus is there for us and loves
us and ask us to reciprocate in this friendship.
So as the world swirls around us
with it changes, our prayer life puts us in one straight path which cuts
through all the confusion of life. We are no longer torn between different ways
of living and wondering where it will all end up. We are walking now in a path
of loving God who becomes the center of our life and gives us confidence that
it will all turn out for the best in the long run. This does not mean that
there will be no more suffering and setbacks in our human living. These things
will always be with us as long as we live on earth. But deep down we know that
our heavenly Father loves us and this is what matters in life. This is then the
basis to our fidelity to the contemplative path and daily meditation because
each day it nourishes our attachment to the Divine and the swirls and
disappointments of our human life and those of the world cannot really hurt us.
As we begin the New Year now, let us
renew our fidelity to our meditation schedule. This is our anchor and so not to
be torn by all the different cycles and swirls of our human life and of the
world. These things will be always with us. But our life is on a different
straight path that breaks through all these earthly cycles and puts us in a
deep relationship with the Lord who ultimately leads us to a new world, eternal
life. Someone loves us and will be faithful to us and our good. We put our
faith here; this is our anchor during the years.
------------------------------------------
