Saturday, August 30, 2014

COMING HOME



SOUNDS OF SILENCE 

Robert Trabold


Sounds of waves crashing on shore
fills whole landscape – hear it coming
from distance. Lovely day not too
cool despite sharp off shore breeze.

I sit on a bench – my eyes scan
seashore.  Dark –bright colors
alternate as sun travels through clouds.

Sunshine brightens sand – glimmers
around me – in the distance
bright borders to blue ocean.
Dark sea full of mystery!

I sit on a Jones Beach bench
dedicated to Pasquale Siccurella
passed away 2013. Wonder if he comes
back at times to enjoy ocean view.

Life goes on – one year after another.
Flow like ocean tides – waves.
Some years are calm – others rough.

Happy I came to the sea
grateful dreadful winter finished.
I can come now to the ocean – listen
to waves.

Sounds of waves wash over me swirl
around me. I sit in mystery – leave busy
city behind me – take a day off.

Mystery of life washes over me
noise of city life – endless wars of my country
cries of poor hungry people looking for work.

Jesus walked on the Sea of Galilee
surprised his disciple – awed.
He will come again - walk on
waters of Jones Beach
surprise me – hold me together.
Take me by the hand – give me hope
for a safe landing.

                             
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COMING HOME


Robert Trabold



            In religious traditions, eternal life and God are spoken about as the goal of our human life, as going home after our pilgrimage on earth. It is a place where we will be unconditionally accepted. Jesus spoke of this when He told his apostles that He is leaving in order to prepare a place for them in his Father’s house. In the eastern religions, this desire to go home is expressed in the three steps of our life’s journey. In the first 25-30 years, we are busy growing up, going to school, learning our work and profession, etc.  After that from 25 - 55, we are occupied in the world working in our profession, getting married and having our family and using our talents to accomplish our responsibilities.  After 55 – 60, the eastern religions describe this time as when the leaves fall off the tree, we are no longer so active in our tasks and obligations. Time opens up for us and opportunities arise to get closer to the transcendent. These years of semi-retirement and retirement can be times of growth in contemplative prayer and God touches people to grow in a deeper relationship with Him/Her. If we look at the contemporary contemplative prayer movements in our country such as the John Main Movement and the Centering Prayer Movement, many of the members have been touched by God to enter this deeper relationship in their later years, in the third stage of their life. In a very real sense, we are preparing ourselves to enter into the house of our Father that Jesus said that He would prepare for us. We are going and coming home.

            This desire to go home is also present within us in our younger years and especially felt in our growth in contemplative prayer. At the heart of contemplative and mystical prayer is the entry into silence, darkness and emptiness where we encounter a presence – the presence of a Beloved one who woos us to love Him/Her. This divine presence at our center is more intimate to ourselves than we are to ourselves, yet it is also transcendent and a mystery to us always slipping through our fingers. As we grow in mystical prayer, this divine presence becomes the rock of and defines our life.  In a very real sense, this desire on our part to go home, to encounter and receive that unconditional love begins on earth. This divine presence at our center is our home because we know that the earth that we live on is not our true one. Our life here is very fragile. Sudden illness can burst in on us and deprive us of many things, earthquakes, hurricanes and tsunamis threaten us and human relationships come and go, wars, etc. The universe we live in, in its human and material dimension, can be very unfriendly. If we anchor ourselves in contemplative prayer, however, and hear the call of the divine presence at our center, we begin to get a taste of the home to which we are called  - our Father’s house.

            The mystics in their deep relationship with God which they grew into in contemplative prayer have tasted this ‘coming home’ for which we yearn. Their relationship with God was central and defined their life.  Despite the unfriendliness of earthly life which they also experienced, God touched them giving them a calmness of being home. Theresa of Avila had this sense of coming home and being at peace in her Father’s house and expressed it beautifully in her famous poem ‘Only God Matters.’


‘Do not let anything disturb you.
Nothing should bother you.
Everything will pass on.
God does not go away.
With patience
It will all work out.
To those who have God
Nothing will be wanting.
Only God matters.’


            Theresa of Avila’s poem expresses the goal of our contemplative prayer and path. As we get closer to God and feel the divine presence at our center, we will share Theresa’s confidence. We will have that sense of coming home and experiencing that place of unconditional love that we desire despite the ups and downs of our life on earth which will someday end. We will taste that coming home which we will fully possess someday when we reach eternal life.

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Saturday, August 2, 2014

CONFIDENCE

 
 

JOURNEY OF MY LIFE

 

Robert Trabold

 

Cutting onshore winds from ocean chill me to the bone

drive me to walk along harbor’s side.

Winter trees there and land calm sharp gusts

offer me shelter.

Bright sun – blue calm water –low tide

invite me to walk along shore.

Curving shore line – brown sand – white bleached sand

sea gulls looking for food in newly freed earth

rocks – old stone walls – bricks uncovered in low tide

leafless bushes – islands in the distance – all populate my walking.

A few humans like me are daydreaming – taking it all in.

 

Low tide changed contours of shore

things once hidden, now reappear.

Is not journey of my life like the zigzagging shore line?

So many events – currents – movements

some painful – others smiling!

My life – a big mystery like rising and falling of the tides

tides open up surprises – then cover them up.

 

Silence permeates ebb and flow of water

shore is silent.

Silence covers it all – embraces all.

I feel it

silence of my Beloved – silence of God.

In ebb and flow of the sea

in ebb and flow of my life

He stands next to me – will not let go. I am not alone.

Mystery of my life – mystery of the sea

mystery of my Beloved

He has a guiding hand – invisible hand – warm and firm.

Hand of God!

 

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CONFIDENCE IN GOD
 
Robert Trabold
 
 
            In the summertime, we might have more time to reflect on our life and where it is going. Our schedules may slow down and we can think of our prayer life of contemplation and where it is leading us. In our meditation, we have our discipline of prayer and attempt to touch God’s presence by repeating the mantra and watching our breathing in and out. Of course, there are always distractions, worries about our life and its many facets and the constant tumult of the world and its wars. But we put those thoughts behind us and again return to our mantra and breathing. This constant putting aside the many distractions, worries and cares that come into our prayer is a sign that God is more important in our life than the many concerns we have about the present and the future. For twice a day for twenty minutes each time, we set our sights on the Lord because He is the primary object of our life and guides us. We have confidence that the rest of life with its cares and worries is not important as the Divine.
 
 
            This putting behind us and away the worries and concerns of our daily living and those of the world reminds us of the teaching of Jesus. In the gospel of St. Matthew, the Lord tells us to put aside our constant worries about having enough to eat and drink and clothes for our bodies. He mentions that life is more than these material concerns.  These worries are basically about survival and Jesus in his teaching tells us that life is more than survival. Rather we have to concentrate on the Kingdom of God and its justice and the Lord will provide for the rest. This is quite a challenge for us because we are immersed in the world, can be sucked into its dynamic of desire for material things and security, etc. and be overwhelmed with the injustices and wars around us. It will take a life time for us to put aside these concerns and fix our sights on the Kingdom of God and grow in such confidence that Jesus proposes to us.
 
            Our contemplative prayer where we put aside these concerns of our material life and the world requires a trust. We have to grow in the belief that God is there for us and will never let us out of his sight. In the gospel, Jesus tells us to look how his Father takes care of the lilies of the fields, the grass and birds.   If this is so, He will extend to us the same care. Jesus exhorts us not to worry about tomorrow since it will take care of itself. This is one of the challenges that we face over the years; we are to be faithful to our daily meditation where the focus is on the Lord. Our relationship with Him will grow. Our love will deepen and so to the confidence of His care which Jesus promises us. This is an important horizon of our life and if we are persistent in growing in this, a peace will come within us. We will not be torn in every direction but keep our sights on Jesus and His promise who then will guide the boat of our life to a safe landing.
 
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